Showing posts with label truth. Show all posts
Showing posts with label truth. Show all posts

To my love...

It's been wonderfulnthroughout my life. I have got everything that I liked most of them rebeled. But there lies one thing that I have never got. No one could even help me getting it....

For that most special lady out there...
Most beautiful one that dragged me the entire life...

          This blog belongs to you. This entire work... every single letter just mean you. You know? The day I was getting tattoed I literally made up my mind... I just not love but live for you. And eery single time the needle peirced, it was just you on my mind. Thats very weird to say even I had girl friends althrough this period, everyone knew that you were my first preference and they were next. I liked you that way. I respect you, and thats the reason why I even stayed away from you. Even now! I wanna give away all my courage to come before you. But I dont dare... because I want all my 10 years of wait to be ended in a beautiful saga and Im not in a position to accept the bitter truth. As you said, I will one day speak to your mom about us. Trust me! And I always even knew that you faked that you had someone. And you accepted it. I will come please TRUST me!

P.S :- I love you


22 days... edge of beark up... and whispers of love made us live together.... It's "US"


Yesterday i.e., 28th nov, 2011 was the 22nd day of my relationship... and it's the most wonderful night I've ever experienced as a teen with his girl friend on phone...

The reality went like this...

day before yesterday we had a really long night together texting on phone and slept at 4am i guess...
We were normal till the afternoon... she texted "am having luch now break.. did you have?"
I said "Am shopping with cousin and had some chicken"
I got no reply...

In the evening something suddenly went on my mind and all of a while she suddenly said "catcha after a while"

I was literally to say PISSED OFF...!!

Then after an hour she texted me back saying "sorry :( mom was on phone :("
I was so mad(went nuts) that i texted her "call or catch me after every thing gets over. may be we can talk tomorrow or day after, good night"

She texted me back saying "what can i do if dad was on phone with mom?"
I said her "ok listen am not pissed off... am sick, am damn busy. i'll catcha tomorrow. good night. love you(i didn't feel anything while i wrote the above love you. am sorry)"

After 10 minutes i got a text... "you didn't feel what?"

In the mean time i scolded myself for short temper.. wept a while and to forget i made a cut on my palm... it started bleeding...

I replied her "wait a min. hand is bleeding. feeling vertigo"

I really felt loosing her at that instant... i loved her so much and am so stupid to get such angry for such small issue....

Then i called her... she was like crying... i said "am realy sorry for what had happened... and for the 1st time on phone with lottza guts i whispered I LOVE YOU... she said "Po da"(which meant get lost) i again said her sorry and then she said ok.. we'll text... let's not talk now

She texted me back "listen it's just 22nd day of our relationship and you were angry on me? we still have 3000days to get together.. are you sure you can make up with me? im sure i can give up frank. can you?"

we got together really well... and finally it's 12am.. everyone is sleeping in our both the places...
she sleeps with her mom and i sleep alone in my room... so i got some privacy to whisper something.. rather than talking....

She texted me "hey i'll call you and i wont speak... please sing a song for me"
I said i can just whisper...she was like "ok.. whisper i love you... i will call"

Frankly i thought Jeez... what the hell is wrong with us...!! we are alright now...

She called me... i said "i love you"
... then she whispered slowly "say some thing.."
i said "i love you" again...
then she asked me to kiss her through the phone...
i said ok and kissed my phone...
she laughed and said "po da" again...!!
Then she said "love you too..." in such a sweet voice that tears rolled out of my eyes
i said "fuck you" to my self in a low voice and disconnected the call...
and then we texted for some time

She said me that " your voice is ...y"(guess you people know that word :p :p :p)
I said "thank you and your 'love you too...' made my day :p"

We again called and dared whispering on phone...!! we don't know what we spoke... because we spoke something that only love knows...

I love you kutty... i'll never leave you and make you cry...! muahh muuahhh.....!

P.S :- this is just a beginning... I'll let you know what ever happens in my relationship my blog...!! because after my girl friend i love you so much...! :p

My love....

Who are you?
How will you be?

Every night in my dream you make me see
You’re beautiful eyes and that honey dew lips
But never show your beautiful face intact and free
I know you’ll some day
But when and how? Is it going to be my last day?

Want you here right now before me
Your beautiful hair with curls like whirls
With those eyes bright like the blue skies
Holding my hands tight and soft
And you’re voice like a morning breeze
So cool touching my heart
I feel like melting butter

It’s very sad when I think of you
Because I’m missing every moment without you
My bed is lost in sleep and I’m feeling insomniac
Seeing the seasons pass by from past 3years

Am still waiting for you
Searching in every possible way
On the planet and in eternal dreams that I dream
Even in the silence just to here your voice
I stand still here now and forever…

I give up......

Oh baby am so sorry for what i've done
It's hell without you and am already in
Is the infatuation that played with my brain?
Or your dreams that i'm lost in

Are you the one which i saw you in that mall
In the hall and on my bed sitting on my couch?
It's so annoying that i should now i should stand still
On my own with out your support , On the wall of the angel's hell

Deep below buried in me
is the land of agony
which is now bursting out, in the form of tears
And Loneliness reigns by royal decree.

Am now without an answer, no not even a clue
Should i wait or wake from this dream of you
This is a torment that i cant fight anymore
My tears were out and i can't cry anymore

I thought you would be with me
Till the end of the sun and moon's light in the night
But i came to know that it's just a dream in twilight
That can never ever be cherished even though i fight

Arts degree is for people who wish to live their own life…

Guys now a day’s people’s way of thinking have changed drastically. Even the parents now a day are just forcing their kids to join either in engineering stream or medicine stream.
                     Well particularly in my state Andhra Pradesh where education has become a business here. They just force a kid of 11th standard to study for nearly 13hours a day in college without any extracurricular activities. Which I think is too insane. But what all they need is marks. Well even an average guy like me can score 100% marks if he is made to study in the way he likes.
                       Listen guys’ studying is important. But I say studying the subject a student likes is very much important. And “RANKS ARE NOTHING BUT NUMBERS, BUT TALENT IS THE ONE THAT EARN YOU THAT NUMBERS”
                        And who the hell said that “arts is for dummies”. For those who think like that I’m saying that “arts is for people those who wish to live their own life”. And “engineering and medicine are the subjects for money bugs!”
                     See even the great scientists at the end write their own book called “auto-biography” which is an art not science. And the books you are reading are also a form of art and the machines that engineering students use also 1st came from artwork and designing…
                      Am not criticizing the people who studied engineering because I myself is a student of engineering. But the way of thinking in this country should change. Here everyone thinks of money fame and luxuries. And they think only way is doing a professional degree…! Isn’t it insane?
                         Even most of our parents have done their mainstream degree in arts they don’t wish their child to read arts. Why?. It’s not the problem in some families. But many of them wish their child to become either an engineer or doctor. Are they the only professions that can earn money?. I say NO.
                              You know guys in my state alone there are nearly 800 engineering colleges and 100 medical colleges. Why does the government and even the private sector start colleges for only engineering? Why can’t they open colleges for arts, architecture, literature, pure and applied subjects and other courses?
                            The reason is only one. Parents here wish their son to become either engineer or doctor right from their early childhood. And even the kid even though after some period of time likes another subject he is getting forced to join in an engg or medical college.
                         I myself want to become a photographer right from 15. I applied for MIT, JJ and HALLMARK. But I can’t go there now only reason my parents don’t like me becoming a photographer… the reason might be simple guys but the impact on me was terrible. I’m now getting good grades but there is a place in me for photography. Like that I know many people are suffering around the world.
                      Only way to get out of this depression is just do what your parents say else explain them the subject you like and please them.
Don’t study for earning, study for a better living.

TO my beloved........


Am so happy for you
For your life is happy now
Am so angry on you
Because you started seeing me low

My life is in dust
Ruins and like mist

I wanted you for the whole of my life
But you didn’t accept me for a single moment for your life

But one thing girl
I hate the way you lie
Even though it made you cry
And you hate the way I love
I still don’t know why

Now got I got no word
Not even a single syllable
Because I have no mouth to speak
No ears to hear
Not even an eye to see
And even a face because am dead

Just to see you smile
 And to make you happy
Just to hear you whisper
In your guys ear
The word I wanted to hear……

For thee i R.I.P      -Your beloved

TO My FrIenD ThAt Am MissSiNg................!! :(

Many days are yet to come
And many years are yet to pass
Now that we are apart
I can see you in my solitary heart

Disasters are there to happen
Everything happened is just for our sake
Violence is built to last. But,
I will never forget you in my course

Beware of the teenage drug…!
Experienced is saying just for your own goodness
Zeus even fell in love it seems
According to me it’s all trash
Wish I were there in front you
As a friend when you are in hermitical place
Divinity is only in god’s way! No,
An exception is our eternal friendship I say.

                                                                                        -jaynth busi
  (Written to my best friend whom am missing now
           Her name is hidden in the poem. Say it if you can!!!)

AwAiTInG For RaIn...............


awaiting with a million eyes
for just a water of rain
but cant even see a sight
of a small cloud

Its life
not a movie

photographer :-jaynthbusi-photography  

DonT EvEr ThInk LiKe ThiS................!!

10 things you should not say when you are in depression...!

1.    Am Worthless and would be better off dead.
2.   I have no value and no meaningful purpose for being here.
3.   I’ll never amount to anything.
4.   No one loves or cares for me.
5.   My situation is hopeless. I see no way out but to die.
6.   I’m stupid, I’m dumb, I’m ugly.
7.   Life doesn’t love me.
8.   Life is the pits.
9.   My future is hopeless.
1 0.   Nobody can help me.

Guys I experienced the worst situations in life… so, am saying you all that never ever think of you in a negative way……… whatever happens is just for our sake only…

And SUCIDE is not the answer for your depression.! It’s a coward thing… stand up and jump the walls of depression. You’ll land in the world of happiness……
                                                -Jaynth busi

My Cute PiNkiE........!

Till the Moment I get plucked
I will be with you, I swear
I love you……….

photographer :- jaynthbusi-photography

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